Zero tolerance!

I have this funny thing with food. My kids and food that is. I cannot STAND picky eating. Ever since they were little I have dished up their food and they have just eaten it. It was a non-issue at our house. Of course they had their favorites, but they just knew from the time they were born that they would eat the food I gave them. Even the slightest act of dislike was quickly dismissed and we would just move on with the meal. It has worked great for us.

The last year or so they have started to express themselves a little more when it comes to food. Honestly I think it is from being around other people who are picky eaters and seeing that they have a choice, and so they have been testing me a little. I will give them some food, things that they usually LOVE and they will act like they don't like it. I swear just to see what I will say. It makes me SO mad. The thing is, I make great food. I am a pretty good cook, and I always give them good meals and great variety. I totally get not liking food that is nasty, or that you eat all of the time (variety is the spice of life). I would never expect them to eat something that isn't good. But seriously, I was starting to get so mad with the whole food thing. I was at my boiling point to say the least.

From 2011

I feel like kids need good well rounded nutrition. I do not want kids that look malnourished and weak but I don't want junk food junkies either! I want them to have a healthy brain and body. I think that you need to eat a good variety of foods, and I think that kids need to learn to adapt. We live in a world where everything isn't just the way you want it. Food included. You can't be picky about everything, instead be grateful for the food you have, and that it tastes good.

Before I go on too much further and seem like a jerk, I am NOT one of those parents that makes my kids sit at the table until they clean their plate, although they do lick it clean sometimes. If I know it is something that they may not like, something unusual like squash or something I only give them one, and if they want more great. If they don't eat that bite fine. But at least they have the option. I know some things have odd texture and taste to kids. I remember that, and let lots of things go that I can see being grose to a kid, but for the most part I really have no tolerance.

Each day I make the kids a great breakfast. They can choose a hot breakfast, cereal, or whatever. Sometimes I make three separate breakfasts, but it really doesn't take that much time and I think breakfast is so important that it is worth it for me. They never complain about breakfast.

I pack Kenna and Carson a lunch, so they just eat it. They do trade with other kids sometimes, but I love that. It teaches them how to operate in the real world. It is kind of a business thing. Sometimes I am really proud of their trades. Carson once traded 2 chips for a whole package of fruit snacks. That was a steal. A proud day for me.

Dinner is where the problem sets in (and really this is only like once a week, but really I have ZERO tolerance!) We sit down and one of them will get this concerned look. I feel my blood pressure rise. Before they speak I give them the look of death. They think really hard about if they want to start the war. Usually they just start eating, but occasionally one of them will be feeling brave and they say something like, "I don't like this because it seems hard..." then the curl up into the fetal position and brace themselves. They end up either eating it, or not eating it and being done with food for the night. But they know that if they don't eat it, they will miss their evening eating binges that they love so much. 9 times out of 10 they eat it. And like it. Did I mention they can eat WHATEVER they want WHENEVER they want as long as they eat their food? They have it pretty good.

Anyways, the other night I made this Chili Verde that is to die for. Everyone loves it. We sit down and Carson and Coren both say that they don't like it. Before they even ate it. Plus, they usually LOVE it. I kind of freaked out. Steve saw the freaking out about to happen and decided to handle it so our kids could live. He went and got a shoebox and dumped their food into it. He handed them tape and a marker and told them to package it up so that we could sent it to someone who didn't have food. They were both in total shock. Finally after some tears, they packaged it up and put it on the porch.

From 2011

While they were doing this I pulled up some YouTube videos of starving kids. I made them watch a few. They are horrible to watch. There was one where there was this tiny bone thin child near death. A vulture was waiting next to him so that he could eat him once he passed away. My kids couldn't handle it. The whole family was in tears. My kids were amazed that there were kids like this in the world. They felt very sad, ashamed, and were very shaken up. How sad that I had never showed them these movies before. They need to know, they need to be grateful.

So how does this story end at the Johns house? The kids went to bed without food for the first time in their lives. They chose that by not eating. The next day they were starving and beyond humbled. They were so grateful for their food. Coren came home to lunch that was ready to go, and wouldn't be his first choice (or second or third choice) and ate every bite and thanked me for it.

From 2011

Really the main reason I hate picky eating is this. First, I hate it when kids are whiny and with picky eating comes whining. Second, I think picky eating is a sign of bad parenting. I really hate to say that but that is how I feel. Obviously I am guilty since my kids were being picky, so I am not just saying it is other people. I let it happen too. I think that the parents either feed their kids crap (and that is when picky eating is justified) or the parents have no control. I read an article once that a child has NEVER let me repeat NEVER died from choosing not to eat or starving themselves. The article said that children use picky eating to see what they are capable of getting from their parents. It is a total control thing. They mentally freak themselves out and create this issues for themselves or to get a reaction out of us suckers. My kids have dry heaved, puked, acted like they were choking, said they were going to explode and die, cried, acted like the food was burning them, you name it, but at the end of the day it was all in their heads and I let it happen by not stopping it sooner. Funny how they don't have that problem now!?! But last and most important I hate it because there are so many starving children in the world. We should be so grateful for our food, and allowing our kids to be picky is really a dis-service to them.

And finally, my last test. I had to see if the kids had been reformed. The next night the boys came home from a friends house to the exact same dinner that they had hated and boxed up the night before. I secretly filmed them to see their reactions. Well not one complaint, all smiles, ate every bite, and Carson had seconds. This was a few weeks back and I am SO happy to say that I haven't had any food complaints since.


I am for sure not the best Mom, in fact I kind of suck, but I am so glad I got this handled now, because it could have gotten so bad so fast! I am sure I have offended people with this post, but I put it on here because I want my kids to have it for when they are raising children, and so that they can see what dorks they were, and maybe it will give other people some ideas to help them out if they are going crazy like me. Honestly I think I am going to start showing the kids videos like that more often. They need to see it, and they need more gratitude in life.

Well, I am off to solve my next life crisis... Coren and Kenna not making their beds. Carson will be coming home to a dollar on his bed since he is the only one that makes it every day. I wonder how many beds will be made tomorrow? Awe, the life of a Mom, it's funny really.