There are a few things that I am constantly harassed and teased about, mostly from my sister and my husband. It seems to be worst when they are together and gang up on me, but deep down I know that they are totally jealous of me! They make fun of me only because they wish that they were more like me. At least that is what I tell myself to keep out of Psychiatric Care.
The first is how I am SO short. I am not sure when 5' 3 1/2" became midget size, but you would think that I am the shortest person in the world. Steve calls me 'short stuff' and even tells the kids that I rode the short bus to school! Sometimes they act like they cannot find me... and the jokes go on and on. They have my whole life!!
Next is my cute little toes. Well, at least I think that they are cute. Steve says that they are all the exact same toe; little midget toe clones stacked next to each other.
Brooke and Steve have also mentioned that peoples second toe (the one next to the big toe) should be longer than the big toe. If not, they say that it is a sign that you are not intelligent. According to them, they had some proof of this theory, but I have yet to see any hard or convincing evidence! As you could probably guess, they both have a long second toe, so that tells me that they are not correct. It seems to me that the long second toe actually indicates quite the opposite, and that is why my I.Q. is off the charts! I am WAY smarter than most people actually know, I just hide it so that I don't make them feel uncomfortable or sad.Now, during my recent visit to Idaho, I said something in front of one of my 'TEASERS' that I will probably be able to add to my list of things that I am constantly teased about. One more thing that I will never hear the end of.
Here's what happened: It started out as an innocent trip to McDonald's. Brooke and I went to get the kids some kids meals. I got up to place my order with the young boy working at the counter.
ME: I need three kids meals. Two nuggets, and one cheeseburger.
BOY: Will that be to stay or to go?
ME: To stay or to go.
BOY: (looking confused) OOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKK
BROOKE: (Punches my arm) You retard! Do you want to work here or something?
ME: What?!? (Did I miss something?)
An innocent mistake. A mistake that I will suffer for the rest of my life!!!
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3 comments:
I have the same toes as you. I've always thought they were normal and the people with the long 2nd toe were the weird ones.
I'm super smart too... I also have your toes. Long finger toes are definitely the weird ones!
OK, now I feel bad. I am really glad I didn't buy you a shirt at Kohls that said, "I'm short, I'm fun size". I will try to control myself from here on out!
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