High School

The other day wen I was running I heard this song about High School.  It made me start to laugh because it was SO TRUE.  It talked about what mattered in high school, and I started to think about how funny we really are during that time.  And, how it would be so nice if the worries that we have in life as we grow up were as simple as these:

Transportation:  You are only as cool as the people that you drive with.  How HORRIBLE would it be to be seen driving alone?  Or worse, to have a piece of crap car or none at all.  Of course, you NEVER want to be seen walking to school, especially alone.  Nothing is cooler than someone who has a really nice car.  In fact, if you have a nice car you are known for it.  "You know, that guy who drives that really nice convertible!  He is like SO cool!"

Notes:  Remember the notes.  Man, the more notes you got the more popular you were.  There were just so many things to say to people, and it had to be said in a note.  So, instead of paying attention in class, you spent all of your time writing a note to someone that you would see in about 40 minutes being really careful not to let the teacher see it.  Then you would decorate it up really cute, and then fold it with your coolest note folding technique.  Then, as soon as the bell would ring you would pass that person in the hall and give them their note.  The note that took all of class to write and really said nothing.  So instead of just saying, "Hey let's ride home together!" you asked them in a note.  Then, they would spend all of the next class writing their note that basically said "OK, Sure, SO FUN!"

Clothes:  DO NOT come to school in clothes that are not from the Gap.  If you do, you are truly a loser.  And please, if you wore that last week, do not show up in it for at least two more weeks.  That is just NOT OK!  You better be wearing those Guess jeans, or your family is poor.  Even if they aren't poor, they are poor.  Either that or they are just totally rude and probably hate you, so everyone else should hate you too, right?  And if you happen to have a Letterman's jacket because you are just a TOTAL JOCK STUD, wear it daily.  It doesn't matter if it is burning hot out, you can cool off later, just WEAR THAT COOL THING!

Lunch:  You cannot sit alone.  In fact, if you do not see a familiar face, you are better off locking yourself in a bathroom stall pretending to pee so that no-one sees what a LONER you are.  PLEASE, get some friends.  Even if you don't know someone, act like you do.  Being alone is just NOT cool.  And really, eating in the lunch room?  Don't you know that you can go to Arby's?  I mean, this is high school.  We DON'T eat in a cafeteria.  That is so sick.   BUT, if you do eat in the cafeteria you have some choices to make.  See that table with all of the "cool kids"?  Are you cool enough to sit there?  I mean you know them, and they say HI and stuff.  But, are you at that WAY COOL level that you can SIT next to them?  If you brave it and sit there once, then you are in.  You can now officially sit there every day!

Dances:  You better get invited or else.  And, the sooner that you get asked the better.  Then, if you do get asked (YOU BETTER GET ASKED) you need to go and spend at least $100 on a dress.  And, you can NEVER wear that dress again.  Wearing it for 5 hours just make it so OLD and if you are ever seen in it again, well, you will probably NEVER get asked to another dance again!  Then, get a fun group together, and get you hair done really nice.  You may want to even go and get a MAKEOVER.  OH MY GOSH, they make you look SO HOT!  Then comes the dance.  You go to a really nice dinner, and then show up and dance one or two songs and then move on to your next activity, after the pictures of course.  After all, the picture is what the dress and the hair and the makeup was really for, right?

Boys:  We need boys every second of every day.  You arrive at school, and immediately start looking for that boy that you are "IN LOVE WITH".  How great is it to actually be able to see him before school and walk around holding his hand.  Then you have to part ways (it is SO SAD) and go to class.  You BETTER write him a note, after all, he needs to know how much you miss him and how hard it is to be away from him.  Then the bell rings, and you are on the hunt.  You know HIS schedule just as well as yours, so you know that he will be walking down the west hall.  You charge towards the west hall, passing notes on the way.  Then you see him.  Finally, after what seems like years you re-unite!  You hurry and hold hands and then run off to your next class where you read the note that he wrote back to you.  You write back and remind him about the dance coming up.  He better ask you!  FAST.  Soon, people are going to be asking if you were asked to the dance yet.  After school, you go and find your man.  Then once you get home you call him.  The next week you realize that you hate that guy, and so you have a new man.  Hopefully, this doesn't mess up the dance.  If so, wait to break up until after the dance (or after Christmas, you know he got you something!)

Grades:  NOT IMPORTANT.  Do what is necessary to get by.  As long as you don't get grounded from your man and your girls, you are one happy chick.  Writing notes is so much more important than an A, right?

Football:  The big event.  Show up to the games, because that is where everyone else is at.  Cheer, even though you have NO idea what is going on.  Just BE THERE.  It is the place to be.  Boys, if you can, wear a Letterman's jacket.  Even if you don't play football, you need to show that you are good at something else.  Plus, it attracts girls, and let's the guys know how cool you really are. 

Girls, please tell me that you are either on the drill team, or a cheerleader.  After the games you need to spend lots of time in the locker room getting yourself looking HOT!  You know you worked hard, and everyone needs to know.  When you come out, please come together.  It looks WAY cooler.

Gossip:  The more you know, the more you are needed.  You need to know what is happening, who is happening, and who are together or not together anymore.  Tell everyone, and then they will tell everyone, and then COOL, the whole school knows.  To bad it was all a lie!  OH WELL, you better hurry and re-apply your lip gloss, the bell is about to ring.

Sluffing:  OK, at least sluff seminary.  And when you sluff and risk your life (my parents are going to kill me, OH WELL LET'S GO!) just go and drive around or something.  I guess if you are a rebel, you could go and get high.  If you do get high, please tell everyone.  They will think you are cool and really brave.  Maybe they will even call you a "druggie!"

So high school, man those were the days!!  What would I do if I had to do it over again?  

***PS- I didn't do those things, just the other stupid girls did.  OK, I did a few things, but don't tell anyone.  You are the ONLY one that I am telling, I swear.  I can trust you, right?*** 

***PSS- I would love it if someone wrote me a note.  I will write you back, I promise.***

*** PSSS- I totally LOVE you and you are my BFF!***

*** PSSSS-  I am going to learn origami so that I fold notes really cool, so if you want one, write me a note next period and I will write ya back!***

***PSSSSS-  I put a note with this one for my boyfriend.  It is a love letter with some juicy details.  I know you have math with him, so give it to him for me.  Don't read it, ya swear?***

                                         -K- BYE!

Wait!  The most AWESOME thing just happened.  My neighbor just brought me some tomatoes.  She could have given them to anyone and she chose me!!!  I think I am going to make her a note and pass it to her in Relief Society!    I think I will use my favorite scrapbook paper!  You know what this means don't you?  Don't you?  I am popular here!  OH.....  I am so excited.  I hope she writes back!